Friday, August 22, 2008

Rejected Petitions

In sacrament meeting last week, someone made a comment about how you can tell how much the Lord loves you when you look back on the prayers that he has said, very gently, "no" to. I've been thinking about that a lot lately. I've been thinking about the people in my life and the person that I am today and how grateful I am for the way the Lord has guided my life by saying "no" to things I really thought I wanted.

For example, I remember praying so long and so hard that I would get accepted at the Oberlin Conservatory so I could study harp with Yolanda Kondonassis. I knew that it would be a grueling musical education and would prepare me for almost anything I wanted to do in the competitive harp scene. I remember wanting so badly that degree. I wanted to be a fierce and independent, the paragon of dedication and technical prowess. How far that is from the life I'm living right now! And yet, how grateful I am for the change of plans!

I love being laid back about music. I love being a wife and a mother. I loved attending BYU and using my talents with the harp to help others tap into the Savior's love. Now, I love being a homemaker and sometimes music teacher. And, not to sound so corny, I love being married to Scott. I never would have found anyone remotely like him at Oberlin.

1 comment:

TopHat said...

I don't get a lot of "no"s, but I have had my fair share of "whatever you feel like is fine with me"s. This is very frustrating! I want an answer, that's why I'm asking!

But a lot of my best choices have come from Heavenly Father saying, "either answer is fine." My major in college, whether or not to marry McKay, Margaret's existence, Margaret's birth. These were all choices that Heavenly Father just stood back and said, "Do what you want. It'll be fine whatever you choose."

Hooray for agency. And ambiguous answers. And "no's" since that's what your post was about. :)